Saturday, June 17, 2006

i want to give you something

this week... has pretty much been freaking awesome, for the most part. the mario party party, guys, was awesome. it needs to happen again. also seeing movies? what? i haven't been to see a movie since like... a long time. but cars was really good, and nacho libre was good (but not too spectacular).

also lots of other hanging out. jill, i'm +++ glad you are back. i kept almost calling you. and daniel too, you slacker. same with dee, only you're not back yet... since you won't be for a while and all. my spring woods homies, hanging with yall has reinforced the fact that i missed it a lot this year.

and you freaking graduated boys... what am i going to do when you leave? nobody will be online any more but me! it will be tres sad/upsetting.

and becca gets home sunday! which is exciting. and... lauren is still in germany... uli leaves, which is really sad. i'm going to miss you so much, uli. french class will never again be the same. you are an amazing person and i hope you still talk to me when you get back to germany. maybe we will all just have to come visit you.

i leave tomorrow for the beach (really early, too. bleh), where i will be until sunday night. i leave again next friday for yearbook camp (as if i wasn't cool enough already, right?). after that begins my sporadic being here/not being here-ness which will continue until the end of summer. so much for days of waking up at noon, not making plans until really late and getting home at midnight... sigh... oh well.

truth be told, i'm scared shitless about college. i want to go and all, but where... and what will happen. everything changes, you know? you lose touch with the friends you've had for so long. we will be out on our own for the first time. i mean, i'm sure we'll be fine, everybody seems to be. it's like when i was scared that i would kill myself almost instantaneously upon getting in the driver's seat of a car. but all the applications and the trying to make yourself look good... the doubt is tremendous. looking back, i almost regret not doing some things. never really getting my gold award, not trying harder in some of the classes i didn't like as much, never really having initiative with art, never doing something truly amazing.

/rambling of the day.

i've been wanting to give to you for years...